Monday, May 19, 2014

Weekends were made for...fever and chills?

Friday morning MM awoke, sat on the edge of the bed longer than usual, said "I feel out of it." Ten minutes later on the sofa sipping coffee I checked his oxygen saturation, 86. "How did you know?" Past experience tells me that when he feels out of it he's not getting enough oxygen to his brain. He texts me at work mid day: "91." I am relieved. I accidentally send the text meant for friend Nancie to MM, "meet you out front at 12." He texts back "hug?" Strange that Nancie is late for lunch and strange that MM would send a virtual hug. Then I realize my first mistake. I am happy for the hug and send one back to MM to which he  replies "huh?" It's all clear now. He was not sending a virtual hug. He was wondering where we had agreed to meet at 12.

Saturday MM wakes with fever. I lay out the ibuprofen and antibiotics prescribed by Dr. Cury for occasions such as these. I don't even have to explain to him about preserving what lung function is left. He takes the antibiotic without protest.

MM arranges for another Scout Dad to supervise the volunteering Boy Scouts at the library. I deliver buckets and scrub brushes to the library for the Scout's service project. Then home to gather boys to shop for a birthday present for dear friend and neighbor. Three o'clock birthday party at the neighborhood pool for friend turning 14. Girls are invited. Girls, really, already? I am adult chaperone number three for the pool segment of the evening. Then the kids return to the celebrant's house to watch The Avengers, eat pizza and cake. MM spent the day on the sofa, no return of fever.

Sunday morning we are all up early. MM says he is going to stay home from church, save his energy for the scout planning meeting tonight. The boys vote for the early service, 7:45 a.m. and we are off. Back home by 9 a.m. I start cooking, laundry and prepping for the week and am mostly done by 12. Lunch is served, laundry in process, the house a disaster. Off at 2:30 with Butter to Scout Advancement, until 5. Home at 5:30 MM running a fever again. I deliver imac to the Scout planning meeting at church for next year's camping schedule. The father of yesterday's birthday celebrant will bring imac home.Off to Shell to get gas for the week and then Publix to get fruit and such to pack in the boy's lunches this week. In Publix I get a text from Angel friend Sara saying she is at Publix can she get me anything. We meet in aisle 2. She agrees to be on call Sunday night in case I need to take MM to the hospital

I survey the living room to assess exactly how fast I can clear the Lego, backpack, flue, sneakers, Yukelele , flute debris to clear a path for potential paramedics and stretcher should the need arise in the night. I try not to be mad at the kids for being kids and I try not to be mad at MM for being sick.

MM mentioned that his mustache is growing back, as is the hair on his head. He is pleased. I find myself wondering if the hair is growing back, is the cancer growing back too?

This morning MM emails the Weber. Immediate reply with concrete guidelines received. MM does NOT follow the guidelines. Instead he tells me the fever and chills are over. He is better. He does not need to take a 48 hour holiday from his cancer drugs as recommended by the Weber. The cancer drugs = LIFE for MM. He cannot fathom stopping them for even a day or two.

We talk on the phone on my commute home. He assures me his is better. He will take the boys to tonight's scout meeting. I arrive home. He says he is worse, since right after he got off the phone with me. He will take the boys and I will pick them up. When I return home with boys Melanoma Man is looking for extra blankets. It is 79 degrees in the house with comforter on bed, now winter blankets. I am not convinced that he is better.

I get MM settled in bed then get watermelon for the boys. Butter says Watermelon makes him sad because he remembers that cousin Roy always cut up the watermelon for the kids at Riverton. We saw Roy at Thanksgiving and a month later he was gone, having lived his life right up to the edge in spite of his years long battle with cancer. Butter says he's not sure he wants to grow up anymore. "You know why Mom? Because after awhile the world stops giving you things and then it starts taking them away." 

1 comment:

  1. I'm able to make muffins again . Thank you for putting everything in perspective.